Two Lies and a Truth

April Fool's Day Deserves a Little Truth

Well, the best practical-joke day of the year is upon us again. I’m not quite sure how it snuck up so quickly this time, but here we are. In honor of an icebreaker game I’ve played more times than I can count, I’m offering the April Fool’s Day version of Two Truths and a Lie, appropriately rebranded for the occasion.

So, for those of you who have never been subjected to – I mean, had the opportunity to play this with people you don’t know, here’s how it works. I’m going to tell you three things about myself, and you have to decide which one is the only truth.

Pretty simple, right? Let’s go.

1. I stopped caring what other people think of me a long time ago.

2. I have three children – you can’t hurt my feelings anymore.

3. Every day I wake up thankful that I still get to do the only job I ever wanted to do.

Let’s unpack these a bit.

Do I care what other people think of me? When I look at my life, I realize just how incredibly blessed I am. I have a wonderful family (remember the three kids?), a career I love (foreshadowing number three?), and enough life experiences behind me to be genuinely grateful for them all. I do things I love. My husband and I make decisions based on what’s best for our family – not what other people think is best for our family.

I have friendships that have lasted more than forty years, and newer ones that I hope will last just as long. All signs point to a person who’s completely unbothered by outside opinions… right?

You can’t hurt my feelings. Seriously. I have three children – two of whom are now fully grown adults living independent lives. Sometimes I’m convinced the oldest one is a little too invested in our living arrangements. It’s rare that we talk on the phone without him asking when we’re going to sell our perfectly good house and move somewhere flat. Somewhere with no stairs.

In other words, he’s saying, “Mom, I think you’re old, and I don’t want to take care of you when you break something.”

(Which is especially rich considering I fell down the stairs in our not-so-flat house two years ago and broke… well, never mind.)

And do I wake up every day thankful to do what I love? You’d better believe it.

Just today, I made a presentation to a visiting group of college students and told them I have the best job in the organization – because I get to tell the stories that define who we are. I work with people across every part of the company and with community organizations doing meaningful work. I get to mentor young professionals, and when I look at them, I see so much promise – for their futures and for the future of our profession.

So – do you think you know which one is the only truth?

Before you answer, let me tell you why every single one of them is a lie.

I absolutely care what people think of me. That’s why writing and posting online can be so hard some days. I want people to like me – and to like what I write. I know, intellectually, that won’t always happen. We can’t please everyone. Knowing that doesn’t magically make us stop wanting it to be possible.

For those of you who love to write: how many of us sit down, pour our hearts onto a page, and think, “I really hope people hate this”?

If you do, you’re probably writing about different things than I am.

Remember those three kids? I desperately want them to think I was a good mother. Perfect? Not even close. But I need to believe I got the important parts right – that was my most critical job of all.

And about those kids: they can absolutely hurt my feelings.

It’s never intentional, and most of the time they don’t even realize it. I’m endlessly proud of them – watching them grow into good adults building lives, careers, and families of their own. When they’re not trying to move us into a retirement community, they share pieces of their worlds with us: friends, in-laws, jobs, milestones.

But sometimes, after I hang up the phone, my feelings don’t disconnect quite so easily. They linger – throbbing a bit after being stepped on. Because there was a time when I knew everyone they knew. Their entire world fit comfortably inside mine.

We raise our children hoping to one day see them as independent, fulfilled adults. And while that’s exactly what we want, the realization that they must build their own circles – rather than remain inside ours – can hit harder than we expect on some days.

Now, the last one.

I work in public relations and marketing. I tell stories, and I’ve been fortunate enough to do that work for organizations around the world. It truly fits who I am.

But if you want the whole truth?

I wanted to be an eye doctor.

Yes, I can now clearly see how unreasonable that plan was – freshman biology took care of that dream pretty quickly. I’m much more comfortable telling you about my view of the world than checking yours. When I think back to the letters my friends and I used to write in high school – for anyone under forty, that was our version of texting – I know this is exactly what I’m meant to do. And I’m deeply grateful for every day I get to keep doing it.

So there you have it. Two lies and a truth.

Except… that’s not quite right.

Whether they’re true or false, they’re all intertwined. My feelings, my want to be liked, and my writing are so closely connected that I’m no longer sure where one ends and the other begins.

Since I’ve thoroughly confused you now, why don’t you give me two lies and a truth of your own?